1
00:00:08,242 --> 00:00:10,244
No, if you want to stay
in that house

2
00:00:10,311 --> 00:00:13,314
and drive that car, then I have
to live here to save money.

3
00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:16,016
No... I don't agree

4
00:00:16,084 --> 00:00:17,651
that he's a bad influence
on Jake.

5
00:00:20,621 --> 00:00:21,822
Uh-huh...

6
00:00:21,889 --> 00:00:22,956
JAKE:
Uncle Charlie,

7
00:00:23,023 --> 00:00:24,525
I understand
the point spread,

8
00:00:24,592 --> 00:00:26,694
but I'm still confused
about the vig.

9
00:00:28,629 --> 00:00:31,799
Okay... vig is short for
"vigorish"

10
00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:33,167
and it means the percentage

11
00:00:33,234 --> 00:00:34,735
you pay a bookie
to take your bet.

12
00:00:34,802 --> 00:00:36,370
So it's better
to be a bookie.

13
00:00:36,437 --> 00:00:38,939
Aw, my little boy
is growing up.

14
00:00:39,006 --> 00:00:40,741
ALAN:
Judith, Judith...

15
00:00:40,808 --> 00:00:41,942
hang on.

16
00:00:42,009 --> 00:00:43,211
I have got to stop you here

17
00:00:43,277 --> 00:00:44,545
because right
at this very minute,

18
00:00:44,612 --> 00:00:46,280
I'm watching Charlie help Jake
with math.

19
00:00:49,217 --> 00:00:51,252
Well, go ahead
and call your lawyers,

20
00:00:51,319 --> 00:00:54,288
but I think I am well within
my rights here.

21
00:00:54,355 --> 00:00:57,091
Well, I don't know what Jake
is telling you

22
00:00:57,158 --> 00:00:58,726
about Charlie's dates,

23
00:00:58,792 --> 00:01:01,129
but he is a kid
and he blows things
out of proportion.

24
00:01:01,195 --> 00:01:04,565
Well, if by "nude swimming"

25
00:01:04,632 --> 00:01:09,337
you mean she had
no bathing suit on whatsoever,

26
00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:10,738
then that never happened.

27
00:01:16,277 --> 00:01:18,812
* Men, men, men, men,
manly men *

28
00:01:18,879 --> 00:01:20,714
* Men... *

29
00:01:31,559 --> 00:01:33,594
I can see the clothes hamper
was a wise purchase.

30
00:01:36,497 --> 00:01:38,098
Berta?

31
00:01:38,166 --> 00:01:40,634
No, it's Liz Hurley,
but I'm holding water.

32
00:01:41,969 --> 00:01:43,304
I'm still sleeping here.

33
00:01:43,371 --> 00:01:44,905
Could you come back
in a little while?

34
00:01:44,972 --> 00:01:48,041
I could or you could get
your pampered ass out of bed

35
00:01:48,108 --> 00:01:51,679
and let me do my demeaning job
and get on with my hellish life.

36
00:01:51,745 --> 00:01:54,348
Excuse me, Berta,
but the last time I checked,

37
00:01:54,415 --> 00:01:56,083
you worked for me,

38
00:01:56,150 --> 00:01:57,485
so I'll get up
when I'm good and ready.

39
00:02:02,323 --> 00:02:04,492
Sorry I had to pull rank on you.

40
00:02:11,031 --> 00:02:12,366
Berta,
for God's sake!

41
00:02:12,433 --> 00:02:14,202
Hey, do you want
clean towels?

42
00:02:14,268 --> 00:02:16,003
But I'm trying
to do something here.

43
00:02:16,069 --> 00:02:17,037
So do it.

44
00:02:17,104 --> 00:02:19,340
Well,
I can't do it now.

45
00:02:23,177 --> 00:02:24,412
Is something wrong?

46
00:02:24,478 --> 00:02:26,146
I mean, beyond the usual
demeaning job,

47
00:02:26,214 --> 00:02:27,080
hellish life
stuff?

48
00:02:27,147 --> 00:02:28,549
You really want
to know?

49
00:02:28,616 --> 00:02:31,952
No, but I'm up
and my bed's gone.

50
00:02:32,019 --> 00:02:34,888
Okay, so I told you
about my daughter, right?

51
00:02:34,955 --> 00:02:36,056
You have a daughter?

52
00:02:36,123 --> 00:02:37,591
I have three.

53
00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:39,026
Three?

54
00:02:39,092 --> 00:02:40,728
Wow.

55
00:02:40,794 --> 00:02:43,431
You got to start learning
to say no, little lady.

56
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,269
Hey, Berta. Morning.

57
00:02:48,336 --> 00:02:51,239
Now, you know, I hate
to criticize,

58
00:02:51,305 --> 00:02:52,906
but the coffee filters
you've been buying

59
00:02:52,973 --> 00:02:53,941
have chemicals
in them...

60
00:02:55,309 --> 00:02:57,411
...and I love it!

61
00:02:57,478 --> 00:02:59,380
Get out of my way.

62
00:03:02,250 --> 00:03:03,217
So what's wrong
with her?

63
00:03:03,284 --> 00:03:06,254
Apparently,
she has children.

64
00:03:07,521 --> 00:03:09,056
And one of them showed up
last night

65
00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:10,391
and left her little girl,

66
00:03:10,458 --> 00:03:12,326
who I have to drag
with me everywhere

67
00:03:12,393 --> 00:03:14,428
because I can't leave her alone
in the house.

68
00:03:14,495 --> 00:03:15,729
So you brought
her here?

69
00:03:15,796 --> 00:03:18,198
Yeah...
is that going to be a problem?

70
00:03:19,867 --> 00:03:21,101
No.
That's wonderful.

71
00:03:21,168 --> 00:03:22,803
CHARLIE:
Happy to have her.

72
00:03:22,870 --> 00:03:24,104
So where is she?

73
00:03:24,171 --> 00:03:25,439
She's playing with Jake.

74
00:03:25,506 --> 00:03:27,308
Oh, good. A little
playmate for Jake.

75
00:03:27,375 --> 00:03:29,042
Give him something
to do for today.

76
00:03:29,109 --> 00:03:30,278
I just hope they're quiet,

77
00:03:30,344 --> 00:03:32,346
'cause I've
got a lot of work to do.

78
00:03:32,413 --> 00:03:35,516
Nana, did you throw out
my cigarettes again?

79
00:03:39,019 --> 00:03:41,154
Oh, hell.
Dear God.

80
00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:42,856
Prudence, you're 16 years old.

81
00:03:42,923 --> 00:03:45,158
You want to end up on one
of those breathing machines

82
00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:47,094
like your Uncle Chick?

83
00:03:47,160 --> 00:03:49,263
Mom lets me smoke.

84
00:03:49,330 --> 00:03:51,098
Oh, well why didn't
you say so?

85
00:03:51,164 --> 00:03:52,032
No reason
I shouldn't trust

86
00:03:52,099 --> 00:03:53,801
the judgment
of a woman

87
00:03:53,867 --> 00:03:55,836
who's off selling
bootleg Metallica
T-shirts

88
00:03:55,903 --> 00:03:57,871
at a monster
truck rally.

89
00:03:57,938 --> 00:04:01,475
Mom sounds like
a real go-getter.

90
00:04:01,542 --> 00:04:03,043
So what am I supposed to do
here all day?

91
00:04:03,110 --> 00:04:05,313
You're supposed to help
me clean, that's what.

92
00:04:05,379 --> 00:04:07,281
Here, you can start
with his toilet.

93
00:04:10,884 --> 00:04:12,420
Hi.

94
00:04:13,787 --> 00:04:15,055
I'm, uh, Alan.

95
00:04:15,122 --> 00:04:18,225
Hi, Alan.

96
00:04:18,292 --> 00:04:20,494
What kind of car
do you drive?

97
00:04:20,561 --> 00:04:22,596
Uh, Volvo station wagon?

98
00:04:24,398 --> 00:04:25,566
What do you got?

99
00:04:26,900 --> 00:04:28,802
I got nothing.
Not a damn thing.

100
00:04:30,338 --> 00:04:32,005
Hey, Prudence,
I set up my X-Box.

101
00:04:32,072 --> 00:04:32,906
You ready to play?

102
00:04:32,973 --> 00:04:34,408
Sure.

103
00:04:34,475 --> 00:04:36,043
BERTA:
Get to work,
Prudence!

104
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:37,911
Maybe later, handsome.

105
00:04:39,079 --> 00:04:40,448
Stupid old woman.

106
00:04:42,149 --> 00:04:44,418
Isn't she wonderful?

107
00:04:47,187 --> 00:04:48,456
Oh, hell.
Dear God.

108
00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:06,006
Well, I'd better
get started on that work...

109
00:05:10,344 --> 00:05:13,447
I have... to do.

110
00:05:15,849 --> 00:05:19,920
Yeah, I got to catch up
on some... some paperwork

111
00:05:19,987 --> 00:05:24,324
that has to do
with the... the office.

112
00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:28,962
Oh, yeah.

113
00:05:29,029 --> 00:05:29,963
Your job.

114
00:05:30,030 --> 00:05:32,199
Hmm-mm.

115
00:05:32,265 --> 00:05:34,768
Your...

116
00:05:34,835 --> 00:05:37,004
chiropractor job.

117
00:05:37,070 --> 00:05:38,606
Yeah, and you'll be, what?

118
00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:40,641
You'll be writing
a-a jingle?

119
00:05:43,143 --> 00:05:46,447
Yeah... potato chips.

120
00:05:46,514 --> 00:05:49,617
You know, the...
ones in a can.

121
00:05:51,051 --> 00:05:53,921
Yeah.

122
00:05:53,987 --> 00:05:55,489
I like those.

123
00:06:04,231 --> 00:06:05,265
All right, then...

124
00:06:05,332 --> 00:06:06,500
Hmm...

125
00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:11,238
I'm going over to...
that piano now.

126
00:06:11,304 --> 00:06:14,107
Yeah, and I'm going to go
to the-the-the kitchen

127
00:06:14,174 --> 00:06:17,511
and... uh... yeah.

128
00:06:27,721 --> 00:06:29,923
( Charlie starts playing
the piano )

129
00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:34,161
( knocking )

130
00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:36,063
( stops playing )

131
00:06:36,129 --> 00:06:37,865
Hey, you play piano?

132
00:06:42,335 --> 00:06:44,171
Yes.

133
00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:46,607
( Charlie starts playing again
off-key )

134
00:06:53,614 --> 00:06:54,948
You're pretty good.

135
00:06:56,950 --> 00:06:58,218
Thanks.

136
00:06:58,285 --> 00:06:59,587
Are you in a band?

137
00:07:01,088 --> 00:07:02,556
No.

138
00:07:02,623 --> 00:07:04,892
I used to go out
with a bass player,

139
00:07:04,958 --> 00:07:09,563
and he wrote this beautiful song
for me called "Dear Prudence."

140
00:07:11,098 --> 00:07:14,568
Yeah, that sounds like something
a bass player would do.

141
00:07:16,069 --> 00:07:18,438
You know, I've always wanted
to play the piano.

142
00:07:19,773 --> 00:07:22,876
Do you think you could
teach me something?

143
00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:24,545
Nope.

144
00:07:24,612 --> 00:07:26,113
Nothing. Not a damn thing.

145
00:07:29,082 --> 00:07:30,518
So, um...

146
00:07:30,584 --> 00:07:32,252
do you have a girlfriend?

147
00:07:32,319 --> 00:07:33,654
Me? Oh, yeah.

148
00:07:33,721 --> 00:07:36,189
Big-time girlfriend.

149
00:07:36,256 --> 00:07:37,891
We're practically engaged.

150
00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:40,460
Prudence, he's old enough
to be your father.

151
00:07:40,528 --> 00:07:42,530
And knowing your mother,
he might be.

152
00:07:44,364 --> 00:07:46,066
So just wash the damn windows.

153
00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:49,637
I'm not your father.

154
00:07:51,572 --> 00:07:53,140
How do you stand her?

155
00:07:53,206 --> 00:07:54,041
She's such a bitch.

156
00:07:54,107 --> 00:07:55,442
Whoa, whoa...

157
00:07:55,509 --> 00:07:57,277
don't talk like that
about your grandmother.

158
00:07:57,344 --> 00:07:59,246
Hey, you don't know her.

159
00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:01,481
She's all sweet and nice
with you.

160
00:08:01,549 --> 00:08:05,786
Yeah, she's
a real gumdrop.

161
00:08:07,454 --> 00:08:09,189
My point is, you've got
to respect her

162
00:08:09,256 --> 00:08:10,357
because she loves you

163
00:08:10,423 --> 00:08:12,025
and...

164
00:08:12,092 --> 00:08:16,129
I've seen her pick up the stove
to vacuum under it.

165
00:08:17,965 --> 00:08:21,001
Oh, hey, look--
there's Rose.

166
00:08:21,068 --> 00:08:22,770
My... girlfriend.

167
00:08:24,071 --> 00:08:26,006
Come on in, baby!

168
00:08:27,908 --> 00:08:28,876
Okay...

169
00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:31,912
Rose,

170
00:08:31,979 --> 00:08:34,447
this is Berta's
16-year-old
granddaughter, Prudence.

171
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:35,382
Prudence,

172
00:08:35,448 --> 00:08:36,984
this is my girlfriend--

173
00:08:37,050 --> 00:08:39,052
who I'm free to take
across state lines-- Rose.

174
00:08:42,923 --> 00:08:44,592
Oh...

175
00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:50,097
Wow, look at that kiss.

176
00:08:50,163 --> 00:08:51,999
What?
Huh?

177
00:08:52,065 --> 00:08:53,701
Oh, thank God.

178
00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:56,937
Berta, does Prudence
have a boyfriend?

179
00:08:57,004 --> 00:08:58,839
Oh, honey,
don't get me started.

180
00:08:58,906 --> 00:09:00,608
What does that mean?

181
00:09:00,674 --> 00:09:02,776
It means if she gets
a high school diploma

182
00:09:02,843 --> 00:09:04,144
before she gets a baby,

183
00:09:04,211 --> 00:09:06,580
she'll be the first one
in the family.

184
00:09:08,348 --> 00:09:09,149
I'm thirsty.

185
00:09:09,216 --> 00:09:10,618
What's to drink?

186
00:09:10,684 --> 00:09:12,319
The Cransylvania Goofy Juice
is mine,

187
00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:13,253
but you can have one.

188
00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:14,788
Oh, thanks, handsome.

189
00:09:14,855 --> 00:09:16,790
Is this beer
for anybody?

190
00:09:16,857 --> 00:09:18,191
Prudence, you're 16.

191
00:09:18,258 --> 00:09:20,060
Uh, uh, you know,

192
00:09:20,127 --> 00:09:23,964
Prudence, the Goofy Juice
has vitamin C and calcium.

193
00:09:24,031 --> 00:09:27,167
It's much better than beer
for a growing body.

194
00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:31,805
Not that your body needs
to-to-to grow.

195
00:09:35,308 --> 00:09:36,777
I'm done.

196
00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:39,346
You know, Prudence,

197
00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:41,615
I'm the third-fastest
runner in my class.

198
00:09:41,682 --> 00:09:43,016
Cool.

199
00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:44,618
Spring break's over.
Back to work.

200
00:09:44,685 --> 00:09:46,219
Later, stud.

201
00:09:47,487 --> 00:09:50,891
Boy, she smells good.

202
00:09:50,958 --> 00:09:54,995
Yeah, if you like Camel filters
and pheromones.

203
00:09:55,062 --> 00:09:57,564
I got to do some grocery
shopping for your brother.

204
00:09:57,631 --> 00:09:58,832
I'll be back in a little while.

205
00:09:58,899 --> 00:10:00,267
What about Prudence?

206
00:10:00,333 --> 00:10:01,702
She'll be fine.

207
00:10:01,769 --> 00:10:03,370
Just keep her out
of the liquor cabinet,

208
00:10:03,436 --> 00:10:05,939
and don't do anything stupid
or you'll go to jail.

209
00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:09,877
Why would you go
to jail?

210
00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:11,144
Well, that's kind
of complicated...

211
00:10:11,211 --> 00:10:14,214
And why was Uncle Charlie
kissing Rose?

212
00:10:14,281 --> 00:10:15,215
Well, that was, uh--

213
00:10:15,282 --> 00:10:17,550
And what are pherobones?

214
00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:18,418
That one I know and...

215
00:10:18,485 --> 00:10:21,354
JAKE:
Whoa!

216
00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:22,856
Never mind.

217
00:10:34,201 --> 00:10:38,005
Wow. You're
really good at that.

218
00:10:38,071 --> 00:10:39,807
Thanks.

219
00:10:39,873 --> 00:10:41,809
I took some
cosmetology courses.

220
00:10:41,875 --> 00:10:44,812
I figure I'll be a beautician...

221
00:10:44,878 --> 00:10:47,280
or a supermodel.

222
00:10:47,347 --> 00:10:48,348
Cool.

223
00:10:50,083 --> 00:10:51,584
You want another Goofy Juice?

224
00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:53,353
Aren't you the sweetest?

225
00:11:01,461 --> 00:11:03,897
That's twice
he's done that.

226
00:11:03,964 --> 00:11:07,267
You got to admit, she did
a nice job on those windows.

227
00:11:12,539 --> 00:11:15,542
Jake, you need to get started
on that book report.

228
00:11:15,608 --> 00:11:17,344
But Prudence
is thirsty.

229
00:11:17,410 --> 00:11:18,511
I'll take care of Prudence.

230
00:11:18,578 --> 00:11:19,880
Come on. Get going.

231
00:11:19,947 --> 00:11:21,214
Man!

232
00:11:21,281 --> 00:11:22,615
Charlie, you want to...

233
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:24,384
Not a chance in hell.

234
00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:29,389
Remember when you used
to say that about us?

235
00:11:46,073 --> 00:11:48,041
Here.

236
00:11:48,108 --> 00:11:49,476
Thanks.

237
00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:51,311
Where's my little pal?

238
00:11:51,378 --> 00:11:53,646
He has work to do...
kind of like you.

239
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:57,417
Aw. Are you going to tell on me?

240
00:11:57,484 --> 00:11:59,486
No, no, no. It was just, uh...

241
00:12:01,154 --> 00:12:03,490
just an... an observation.

242
00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:06,126
Calling them as I see them.

243
00:12:08,628 --> 00:12:12,165
Glean from it what you will.

244
00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:14,134
What are you talking about?

245
00:12:14,201 --> 00:12:17,838
I'm not really sure anymore.

246
00:12:17,905 --> 00:12:20,841
But I... I do want
you to know that, uh...

247
00:12:20,908 --> 00:12:24,511
I understand how... how angry
and... and powerless you feel.

248
00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:25,913
Believe it or not,

249
00:12:25,979 --> 00:12:27,881
I was a teenager
once, too.

250
00:12:27,948 --> 00:12:29,749
And, uh... I... I can remember

251
00:12:29,817 --> 00:12:32,719
what it's like to... to rebel
against parental authority.

252
00:12:32,786 --> 00:12:36,023
Or, in your case,
grandparental authority.

253
00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:38,591
Can you put some
of this on my back?

254
00:12:38,658 --> 00:12:39,993
No.

255
00:12:41,461 --> 00:12:43,396
If you don't,
I'll burn.

256
00:12:43,463 --> 00:12:45,799
If I do, I will.

257
00:12:50,838 --> 00:12:52,372
Oh! Judith.

258
00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:53,941
What a surprise.

259
00:12:54,007 --> 00:12:55,308
Hello, Charlie.

260
00:12:58,345 --> 00:12:59,512
So...

261
00:13:00,848 --> 00:13:01,882
What's new?

262
00:13:01,949 --> 00:13:03,884
Where's Jake?

263
00:13:03,951 --> 00:13:06,053
In his room,
doing a book report.

264
00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:07,154
How can he do a book report

265
00:13:07,220 --> 00:13:08,421
when he left the book
at my house?

266
00:13:08,488 --> 00:13:09,957
That little dickens.

267
00:13:10,023 --> 00:13:12,392
Trying to pull the wool
over our eyes.

268
00:13:12,459 --> 00:13:15,462
I'll take care of
this right now. Bye.

269
00:13:15,528 --> 00:13:18,598
Charlie,
I want to see Jake.

270
00:13:18,665 --> 00:13:21,201
Oh. Sure. Hang on.

271
00:13:23,036 --> 00:13:26,406
Jake, your mother's here!

272
00:13:37,517 --> 00:13:39,252
What?

273
00:13:39,319 --> 00:13:40,420
Your mom's here.

274
00:13:40,487 --> 00:13:42,222
Talk to your mom.

275
00:13:42,289 --> 00:13:43,490
Here he is.

276
00:13:43,556 --> 00:13:44,791
Hi, Mom.

277
00:13:44,858 --> 00:13:46,960
Hi, sweetie.
Having a fun weekend?

278
00:13:47,027 --> 00:13:49,829
Mm-hmm. You know Berta,
Uncle Charlie's housekeeper?

279
00:13:49,897 --> 00:13:50,864
Of course she knows her.

280
00:13:50,931 --> 00:13:52,032
Who doesn't know Berta?

281
00:13:52,099 --> 00:13:54,001
She brought her
granddaughter over.

282
00:13:54,067 --> 00:13:55,668
CHARLIE:
Yeah. Sweet little kid.

283
00:13:55,735 --> 00:13:57,404
JUDITH:
That's nice. Have you
been playing with her?

284
00:13:57,470 --> 00:13:58,438
Oh, yeah.

285
00:13:59,439 --> 00:14:02,775
I mean, he has. Not me.

286
00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:04,344
Hey, Judith.
What's up?

287
00:14:05,512 --> 00:14:06,846
Well, it turns out

288
00:14:06,914 --> 00:14:10,017
this little rascal was
pulling a fast one on us--

289
00:14:10,083 --> 00:14:12,519
doing a book report
without the book.

290
00:14:12,585 --> 00:14:14,387
Oh, Jake.

291
00:14:14,454 --> 00:14:15,855
All right,
young man,

292
00:14:15,923 --> 00:14:17,590
you get to work
right now.

293
00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:20,860
Jake.

294
00:14:22,695 --> 00:14:24,031
Oh, yeah.

295
00:14:25,732 --> 00:14:27,334
So, uh... thanks
for stopping by.

296
00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:28,568
I guess I'll see you

297
00:14:28,635 --> 00:14:30,137
when you come
to pick him up.

298
00:14:30,203 --> 00:14:31,571
What's going on here?

299
00:14:31,638 --> 00:14:33,040
Nothing. What?

300
00:14:33,106 --> 00:14:34,707
ROSE:
Oh, hi, Judith.

301
00:14:34,774 --> 00:14:36,676
Did you hear
the good news?

302
00:14:36,743 --> 00:14:39,212
Charlie and I
are back together.

303
00:14:39,279 --> 00:14:40,447
Oh, really?

304
00:14:42,049 --> 00:14:44,684
Yep. That's
what's going on here.

305
00:14:44,751 --> 00:14:46,553
Well, just show
a little discretion

306
00:14:46,619 --> 00:14:47,887
in front of my son,
Charlie.

307
00:14:47,955 --> 00:14:50,657
Absolutely. You got that, Rose?
Discretion.

308
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:52,625
Got it, Monkey Man.

309
00:15:00,667 --> 00:15:03,403
I think I have a concussion.

310
00:15:08,841 --> 00:15:10,043
Thanks
for helping me

311
00:15:10,110 --> 00:15:11,711
with my book report,
Prudence.

312
00:15:11,778 --> 00:15:13,346
Oh, no problem.

313
00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:15,315
Fourth grade stuff
is easy for me.

314
00:15:15,382 --> 00:15:17,517
Should be. You did it twice.

315
00:15:17,584 --> 00:15:20,387
Let's go,
before we miss the bus.

316
00:15:20,453 --> 00:15:21,788
Later, handsome.

317
00:15:21,854 --> 00:15:24,557
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.

318
00:15:24,624 --> 00:15:27,027
( sighs )

319
00:15:27,094 --> 00:15:29,396
( sighs )

320
00:15:29,462 --> 00:15:32,365
So, what are we
doing tonight, sweetie?

321
00:15:35,035 --> 00:15:37,437
Rose, I... I really
appreciate your help,

322
00:15:37,504 --> 00:15:40,673
but you don't have to pretend
to be my girlfriend anymore.

323
00:15:42,475 --> 00:15:44,411
Oh, no.

324
00:15:44,477 --> 00:15:46,513
Are you pretending
to break up with me?

325
00:15:50,217 --> 00:15:52,152
( doorbell rings )

326
00:15:58,025 --> 00:15:59,526
2:00 in the morning.

327
00:15:59,592 --> 00:16:01,361
This better be God.

328
00:16:03,330 --> 00:16:05,865
Oh, God.

329
00:16:05,932 --> 00:16:07,967
Hey.

330
00:16:08,035 --> 00:16:10,470
Prudence, what the hell
are you doing here?

331
00:16:10,537 --> 00:16:12,739
I had a fight
with my grandmother.

332
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,507
So? When I have a fight

333
00:16:14,574 --> 00:16:17,477
with my grandmother,
I don't come to your house.

334
00:16:17,544 --> 00:16:18,911
I know. I'm sorry.

335
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:21,114
I just didn't know
where else to go,

336
00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:22,615
and I thought you were cool.

337
00:16:22,682 --> 00:16:25,918
Whoa. Whoa.
Uh... look, Prudence,

338
00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:28,188
this just can't happen.

339
00:16:28,255 --> 00:16:30,257
I mean, you're
a very nice and pretty

340
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:33,560
but, in prison, so am I.

341
00:16:33,626 --> 00:16:35,362
Bitchin' house, man.

342
00:16:35,428 --> 00:16:38,198
You should rent it to MTV.

343
00:16:38,265 --> 00:16:40,433
Who the hell are you?

344
00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:41,701
What's going on?

345
00:16:43,803 --> 00:16:45,472
Put down the toothbrush,
Alan.

346
00:16:45,538 --> 00:16:47,640
We got bigger problems
than gingivitis.

347
00:16:47,707 --> 00:16:49,642
What's she doing here?

348
00:16:49,709 --> 00:16:50,877
Who the hell is this?

349
00:16:50,943 --> 00:16:52,612
This is Freddie...

350
00:16:52,679 --> 00:16:54,214
my fiance.

351
00:16:55,415 --> 00:16:56,983
'Sup?

352
00:16:57,050 --> 00:16:58,785
"Sup?" I'll tell you
what's "sup."

353
00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:01,654
I'm "sup," and I should
be "seeping." Sleeping.

354
00:17:01,721 --> 00:17:03,390
What's going on here?

355
00:17:03,456 --> 00:17:05,658
Well, Freddie came over
to announce our engagement,

356
00:17:05,725 --> 00:17:07,327
and Nana threw him out.

357
00:17:07,394 --> 00:17:11,298
Really? She didn't take a shine
to Bazooka Joe here?

358
00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:13,366
I'm kind of more
of an acquired taste.

359
00:17:13,433 --> 00:17:16,002
So we just need
a place to crash tonight,

360
00:17:16,069 --> 00:17:19,506
'cause tomorrow we're going
to go to Vegas and get married.

361
00:17:19,572 --> 00:17:21,541
Oh, Prudence,
that's a terrible idea.

362
00:17:21,608 --> 00:17:25,078
Yeah, yeah. If you leave right
now, you can beat the traffic.

363
00:17:25,145 --> 00:17:26,479
We can't go tonight.

364
00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:28,748
Freddie's got to pick up
his last paycheck

365
00:17:28,815 --> 00:17:30,150
from the Photo Mat.

366
00:17:30,217 --> 00:17:32,419
Yeah. $218.

367
00:17:32,485 --> 00:17:35,322
I'll give you $300
to leave right now.

368
00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:37,357
Charlie, Charlie,
we can't let them go.

369
00:17:37,424 --> 00:17:38,891
Why not?

370
00:17:38,958 --> 00:17:41,528
'Cause they're stupid,
and they'll die.

371
00:17:41,594 --> 00:17:43,130
What's going on?

372
00:17:43,196 --> 00:17:45,031
Hey, handsome.

373
00:17:45,098 --> 00:17:46,433
Who's he?

374
00:17:46,499 --> 00:17:48,635
This is Freddie,
my fiance.

375
00:17:48,701 --> 00:17:50,503
You're marrying him?

376
00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:52,805
Uh-huh.
Freddie, this is Jake.

377
00:17:54,174 --> 00:17:57,344
'Sup?
'Sup?

378
00:17:57,410 --> 00:17:59,679
Hey, I saw
the lights come on.

379
00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:01,348
Is everything okay?

380
00:18:01,414 --> 00:18:03,816
Yeah, Rose.
Everything's fine.

381
00:18:03,883 --> 00:18:06,953
She's your girlfriend,
but she doesn't sleep here?

382
00:18:07,019 --> 00:18:09,122
Yeah. What's up
with that, Charlie?

383
00:18:10,790 --> 00:18:12,592
I told you
they'd be here.

384
00:18:12,659 --> 00:18:14,294
Come here,
you little snot bubble!

385
00:18:14,361 --> 00:18:16,363
What do you think you're doing
with my baby girl?!

386
00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:18,198
Mom, leave him alone.
I love him.

387
00:18:18,265 --> 00:18:19,466
Give me a break, Prudence.

388
00:18:19,532 --> 00:18:21,368
You're 16 years old,
and your hormones

389
00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:24,771
are doing all your
thinking for you.

390
00:18:24,837 --> 00:18:26,473
Hi. You must
be Charlie.

391
00:18:26,539 --> 00:18:28,007
Hi.

392
00:18:28,074 --> 00:18:29,376
That's it.
We're out of here.

393
00:18:29,442 --> 00:18:30,210
But, Mom!
Grandma!

394
00:18:30,277 --> 00:18:31,311
Shut up, both of you.

395
00:18:31,378 --> 00:18:33,313
Can I at least
give him my number?

396
00:18:33,380 --> 00:18:34,547
He's got your number,

397
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:35,648
sweetheart.

398
00:18:39,986 --> 00:18:42,522
I guess
I'll take the couch.

399
00:18:42,589 --> 00:18:44,591
I'm going.

400
00:18:44,657 --> 00:18:46,793
And don't you ever come back!

401
00:18:46,859 --> 00:18:48,895
Ready for bed,
lamb chop?

402
00:18:50,997 --> 00:18:52,499
It was worth a shot.

403
00:18:57,937 --> 00:18:59,138
Is Mom here yet?

404
00:18:59,206 --> 00:19:01,541
No. Sit down a minute,
Jake, okay?

405
00:19:01,608 --> 00:19:04,043
Did I do something wrong?

406
00:19:04,110 --> 00:19:07,146
No, no. We just
want to talk.

407
00:19:07,214 --> 00:19:09,982
Okay. What do you want
to talk about?

408
00:19:10,049 --> 00:19:11,951
Well, you know how
I've always told you

409
00:19:12,018 --> 00:19:14,921
that you should
always tell your
parents the truth

410
00:19:14,987 --> 00:19:15,955
no matter what?

411
00:19:16,022 --> 00:19:16,989
Uh-huh.

412
00:19:17,056 --> 00:19:18,891
Well, forget it.

413
00:19:20,126 --> 00:19:21,861
Charlie.

414
00:19:21,928 --> 00:19:23,129
Jake, it...
it's just that...

415
00:19:23,196 --> 00:19:25,298
we're just saying
that a lot of things

416
00:19:25,365 --> 00:19:26,899
happened here
this weekend,

417
00:19:26,966 --> 00:19:28,401
and it's not
really necessary

418
00:19:28,468 --> 00:19:30,169
that your mother
know about them.

419
00:19:30,237 --> 00:19:32,004
So you want me to lie?

420
00:19:32,071 --> 00:19:35,342
It's not really lying.

421
00:19:38,077 --> 00:19:40,713
When a boy
becomes a man...

422
00:19:40,780 --> 00:19:42,582
Mm-hmm.

423
00:19:42,649 --> 00:19:44,717
and that's what
you're becoming...

424
00:19:44,784 --> 00:19:45,718
Right, Charlie?

425
00:19:45,785 --> 00:19:47,720
Oh, yeah. A man.

426
00:19:49,622 --> 00:19:52,191
he has to start
protecting the
women in his life

427
00:19:52,259 --> 00:19:53,760
from certain things.

428
00:19:53,826 --> 00:19:55,194
Like the truth.

429
00:19:55,262 --> 00:19:56,929
Do you understand?

430
00:19:56,996 --> 00:19:58,465
I think so.

431
00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:01,033
You don't want Mom
to know about Prudence

432
00:20:01,100 --> 00:20:02,702
and her boyfriend
and everything.

433
00:20:02,769 --> 00:20:03,736
Good man.

434
00:20:05,405 --> 00:20:07,607
( doorbell rings )

435
00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:11,077
Hi, Judith.

436
00:20:11,143 --> 00:20:12,712
Judith.
Hello, Alan. Charlie.

437
00:20:12,779 --> 00:20:14,914
You ready to go, sweetheart?
Yep.

438
00:20:14,981 --> 00:20:16,449
So how was
your weekend?

439
00:20:16,516 --> 00:20:19,386
Uncle Charlie
says I don't
have to tell you.

